"No, I just want you to be strong and not follow us and be yourself."
Never in my life have I been called a follower. I have always been known to choose my own path, write my own papers, and speak up for myself. So when one of my best friends said this phrase to me, it really got me thinking. For as long as I can remember in my life, I have always been a leader in almost everything I've done. Whether that was through FFA, 4-H, school clubs, at work, or in sports, I've always been that person in a friend group who is making the plans and reservations to ensure we get to go out.
So as I was always considered the leader or "mom" of the group, it honestly scared me to be called out on being a follower. Not to say being a follower is always a bad thing, however, I know my best friend meant it in a way where he knew it needed to be said for me to figure it out.
And the truth is, he's right.
Ever since I've left home for college and only been home on random occasions, I've changed a lot. I used to be that strong leader my best friend knew so well, but the more I went to college, the more I lost that strength. And it wasn't necessarily because of college, but rather when I was given the chance to come home or stay at college, I chose home.
It's natural to choose home over a far away place as comfort, but I've never been that scared little girl to go out into the real world. I seek out adventures and am constantly looking for a new challenge. But my one problem is, I really hate change.
Guys, I don't think many people realize that change really does suck, especially when you're from a small rural town, where pretty much everything stays the same. And for me, I've already had so much change in my life, I don't like having more. So when given the opportunity to not deal with it, I often pick the easier route and go back to familiar things, places, and people, such as my hometown.
So I wanted to focus on the three different ideas I was told.
Be Strong.
You are never too old to find strength in your weaknesses. Strength doesn't come from the outside world, it comes from within you. To be strong, there is no specific set of qualifications you need. No, strength is a mindset and you just need to believe you can be strong.
Some may tell you strength is physical, but it's not. The mental capability it takes to be strong is far greater than any amount of weight you may be able to hold with your hands. It is not enough to say you can bench 350 pounds when you can't find the strength to be a kind person each day. So when I tell you to be strong, I mean be strong in your mind and your heart.
Don't Follow.
So many people find themselves lost in a constant battle of being a follower. And why? Because no one is born a leader, you must learn to become one. And for many people, that is the biggest issue as they do not have the guidance they need in life to become a leader.
I am fortunate enough to have had multiple people and organizations around which helped to shape me into the leader I am today, and yet, I still struggle to stay leading. It is not enough to be a leader every once and a while, if you choose to follow people in every other aspect of life. As my bestie said, "I don't want you to follow us.," and he's right. Because I know I am enough and I can do anything I set my mind to.
Be Yourself.
Probably one of the biggest things people forget to do is just to be yourself. So many times I've tried to be something I'm not and it always backfires. There is only one you for a reason so let yourself be the best possible you, you can be.
Being yourself can be scary, especially when faced with new challenges and a hell of a lot of strangers. But it starts with the self-confidence that you are where you are supposed to be and you know you will be amazing at what you do. You got this, so be yourself.
Life is constantly full of ups and downs and unless you stay true to yourself, you will not succeed at what you want most in life. Stay strong. Be a leader. And most importantly, be yourself.
